Author: philw

  • Does Nevada have a feral hooker problem?

    If you’ve been on enough adventures with Desert Pigs, you’ve probably seen things. Within the first year of this movement to pick up trash in public lands all over Nevada, we cleaned one scenic overlook in Dayton that was littered with hundreds of women’s panties.

    Then later, only a few miles from the Dayton mass panty drop, we discovered a juniper tree surrounded by a massive amount assorted self-serving pleasure devices. 

    My first blog on this site from August of 2021 featured a story about a FleshLight getting surrounded by Lyon County deputies in yet another part of Dayton.

    Strange parts of Dayton

    8/11/21 Blog Post


    This region’s wild hooker population has obviously been growing out of control in the past decade, based on their impact on public lands. 

    Clashing points of view

    While some wild hooker groups don’t like me using this term, I keep it real and call them FERAL hookers. This doesn’t mean I support the BLM roundups, and I’m not trying to take any sides, I just think it’s wrong to call them all wild. 

    Many argue that hookers bring in tourism to northern Nevada, while others are concerned about their environmental impact and increased incidents in neighborhoods and highways. Fencing and diversionary feeding has only been minimally effective in controlling populations, as demonstrated by the amount of often expensive sex toys still being found in towns all over Nevada.

    Are feral hookers from the local ranches? 

    To get answers from the reclusive Nevada legal brothels, I was forced to go deep under cover, posing as a marketing manager for over 4 years. Enduring the daily grind of sorting the visual media of scantily clad women advertising their services to the internet and on print material for handouts, I learned the way of the sinners’ petting zoo.

    The courtesans of Sagebrush, Bunny, Love, and KitKat ranches were all well fed and had safe shelter (which came with expensive room rent, 50% of their earnings back to the house, and weekly doctor checks). There were required company meetings called ‘tea parties’, which were nothing like the ones portrayed on HBO’s Cathouse back in the early 2000’s. We all dreaded them. Work meetings just suck everywhere, I guess.

    During my mission at the legal brothels, I did witness a few crash-outs that led to ladies leaving in cabs, and there was rumor of one really weird one that snuck out at night through a dip under the back gate of the employee parking lot… even though they could all just walk right out the gates and leave anytime they wanted.

    Fencing around the ranches, as the late rancher Dennis Hof explained, was never to keep the independent contractors or employees in, but rather to keep out the drunks, tweakers, and pissed off wives and girlfriends.

    Unsolved mysteries of adult novelties

    There are still so many unanswered questions. Why so many rubber ding-dongs out there in the sagebrush? How do they seem to wiggle their way to remote areas of desert all over Nevada? Why is it so fun to stick them on our hoods when we drive the trails, then post them on TikTok, resulting in our accounts restricted? 

    We may never know how the marital aids keep spreading to wilderness across the state’s public lands.

    IMPORTANT SAFETY NOTE:

    If you encounter a ball gag, anal beads, prostate massager, vibrator butt plug, or flesh light in the wild, do not pick it up with your bare hands. Do not keep it, and DO NOT slap your friend in the head with it, no matter how funny that would be. Wear protective gloves, and dispose of it in the trash immediately.

    Let’s Talk About It

  • CONFIRMED: 13 Dayton residents involved in blood sacrifice

    CONFIRMED: 13 Dayton residents involved in blood sacrifice

    On July 19, 2026, 13 residents made the trip to Grocery Outlet in Dayton, Nevada. On this hot Sunday morning, each voluntarily boarded a bus parked out front, where they were interrogated in a tiny room with many personal questions about their health, recent sexual activities and more. After this, they were pricked on one finger to make it bleed, then if a machine deemed the iron levels in their blood to be worthy, they were led to a chair elsewhere in the bus for the blood sacrifice.

    This event, organized by group that calls themselves Desert Pigs, has been regularly occurring in towns all over northern Nevada, and occasionally even as far south as Pahrump.

    Sources tell me that the reason people have been participating in this ritualistic bleeding, is to protect lives of others they don’t even know. This altruistic act comes with no compensation, other than an offering of juice and cookies after.

    Even after collecting 101.25 GALLONS of blood from Nevada citizens, Desert Pigs thirst for more. I’ve uncovered intel that shows they plan another sacrifice on September 26, 2026 in Fernley. The bus will be parked in the Raley’s parking lot, looking for more participants. I can’t say much more here, but…

    I can share this link if you want to investigate more.

    In testimony from survivors of the practice, they explained the blood sacrifice tends to be around 10-20 minutes, but there is an optional “double red” version that takes longer, and only uses the red blood cells, while returning the rest back to the human.

    No noticeable negative health effects seem to be reported, other than some minor bruising. Although, there are rumors of an unidentified man who looks exactly like me, who has a reputation of fainting randomly while being bled. We have no official records to confirm this. [Thanks, HIPAA]

    I recently reached out to a healthcare professional, who asked not to be identified. I asked him if the wild claims of these blood sacrifices were true, and if they were really “saving mommas and babies” as many fanatics claim. I was shocked to learn this claim was 100% true, and that I was holding up the line with weird questions. He then proceeded to show me options for sativa-heavy hybrids in my price range, and told me about a deal they had on gummies.

    Let’s Talk About It

  • Lyon County: you are stupid

    Wait, hear me out:

    It’s not what you think. Let me rewind a little to explain.

    Back in 2018, while I was working for the legal human petting zoos in Mound House, my boss told me to roll with a few of my coworkers to watch a county commissioners meeting in Yerington, where a really confusingly worded item was trying to creep onto the ballot to put us out of business. When I arrived to the packed chambers, I really had no idea what was going on.

    Having attended a few more county meetings, along with many really heated school board meetings, I would always struggle to keep up with WTF was going on, or knowing what was in need of public input at what time. To keep up, I read a lot, and even watched some ancient YouTube videos of 4-H kids explaining the Roberts Rule of Board Meetings. My knowledge was patchy at best, even though I got the crazy idea to run for County Commissioner against then appointed Tammy Hendrix.

    I ran with my stupidity, trying to cure it in (almost)” every way possible. The one thing I never did, out of fear of revealing my shameful stupidity, was simply ask a stupid question. What horrors would I unleash upon myself if I were to reveal I was not wired and trained to dominate the scene of any county meeting?

    Everyone else HAS to know more than me… right?

    Speaking with my fellow citizens while we all try to figure out this data center debacle, I am coming to the realization that many people don’t have any clue about the details of government affairs and open meeting laws. Most seem to fall into the same lazy pattern I do, where it’s expected someone smarter will pay attention and tell us later if there is something to worry about. We even expect that big brained hero to speak on our behalf.

    I have been in too many rooms full of people with no clue, who are afraid to be “that guy” with their hand up to ask a stupid question. That fear, our handlers thrive on.

    Be that guy

    During the last Dayton Advisory Board meeting I attended via Zoom, I witnessed a brave soul raise his hand in the middle of the meeting, asking the most basic questions about the process, while admitting this was the first he’d ever attended. Without fear of being judged, this gray haired legend got his answers, while many others in the room absorbed this divine knowledge they were afraid to seek out-loud themselves.

    My new meeting hero broke down a wall for me. Considering I am a high school drop-out who’s just skated by for a few decades as a graphic artist, I have much insecurity when I am surrounded by a bunch of suits talking politics. Often when I get into social media arguments with folks like Ken Gray, I am a little terrified whenever I see a notification of their response.

    Now it has become apparent that this is the only way for us Lyon County citizens to keep tabs on our dear leaders, reducing the frequency and intensity of them screwing us – we need to lead with our stupidity. Make the guy in the big red chair slow the whole meeting down to explain it to us like 5th graders when necessary!

    And of course, follow me!

    When I cover an agenda and do the video breakdowns for our county meetings, I’m designing it in a way that even I can understand and navigate. Third party services the county uses currently are not mobile friendly, and are even a little clunky on a desktop. With my version, you can stroll into a meeting already in progress, ask someone what agenda item they’re on, then tap two buttons to catch up.

    When meetings are over, and the county uploads their super long YouTube video, I go in and set start times to each separate item and add those to the agenda. This way, you don’t have to sit through 3 hours of a static video to find the topic you wanted to hear them discuss and/or vote on.

    Be stupid and proud!

    Even if you are an expert at politics and open meeting laws, you are stupid at something. When this happens, don’t be afraid to ask questions, even if every single person in the room gives you ‘tude.

    Never judge the person who is brave enough to ask the dumb questions loud enough for all to hear them.

    Let’s Talk About It